legs open wide

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The encyclopeadia of Seduction, in parts

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Legs open wide

Transparent Bikini

So Julie started applying for jobs. Hundreds of them. But each time employers asked for a reference from her old school, they wrote to her with the same reply, "Don't call us, we'll call you." Goodness knows why. Perhaps the school gave her a bad reference?

Now Julie had an older step - brother called Fred. She hated him. A not too successful small time gangster, he called himself Guido, assuming a very un-convincing Italian accent. "It make-a-dem-a think I am-a di Mafioso." He had been offering her a life of luxury, funded by crime - or failing that at least a dodgy job reference. After two years and two hundred job applications, Julie had finally decided to break her moral principles and take the dodgy reference.

So she ended up as a bus conductress, having given the London Omnibus Company a reference more glowing than the Osmonds' teeth.

But it all went wrong as early as her first day, when she decided to buy a newspaper without telling the driver first. She jumped off the platform of the Routemaster bus and ran into the newsagent next to the stop. "Daily Gossip, please."

"Thirty pence please luv."

"I've just started my first job. Look at my uniform! I bet you can't guess what it is," boasted Julie.

"Brain surgeon, perhaps," replied the assistant with as much interest as a eunuch divulging the happenings of the latest orgy.

"Don't be silly," replied Julie. "I work on the buses. Look, there's my bus outside."

"What bus?"

Turning to look at the stop outside, Julie saw there was indeed no bus. She ran out to the street just in time to see her bus, and her first job, disappearing into the distance.

Several more jobs came and went the same way. The longest she lasted anywhere was three weeks, at the bakery. Until the bakery went the same way as the school chemistry lab!

By now the glowing job recommendations were looking decidedly suspect, as Julie's reputation began to precede her. Her cover was almost as transparent as one of Fred's bargain bikinis after a swim.

So it was in absolute desperation that Julie eventually asked Fred for a job, knowing that the only rackets he ran were strictly illegal.

"What sort of job are you after," he asked, dropping his fake accent whilst talking to his stepsister. He believed in saving the pretence for intimidating his protection racket victims.

"One which is legal. And I definitely won't become one of your call girls!"

 

© Peter Smith 2002 - 8